How it feels
What can I say about this one? This piece of work is all about the feeling I get watching light chase; watching colours change - and I was silly enough to submit it for a show without being ready for it not to be selected.
I know by now that acceptance depends on SO many things - the taste of the judging panel, curational issues, space, interpretation of brief/theme and so on. I thought I had the skin of a rhino and enough experience to not mind as much as I do. Maybe it is because this work is so personal; as I'm going to continue in this vein - then maybe I'm going to have to get used to it lol.
Earlier this year I wrote this
"Since the beginning of the year I've had a calendar list of opportunities on my studio wall. Last week I took it down and threw it into the recycling bin- it had become a reproachful list of applyapplyapply, that honestly - I didn't really want to take up.
You know that thing where you see a submission oppo, go and see what kind of thing fits and then wonder how your square peg will fit in that round hole? Why do I keep doing it?"
Well now I know it goes both ways - try to fit in and feel wrong about doing it - or be true to your feelings, expose them and risk rejection for a million different reasons that often have nothing to do with the actual piece you are submitting.
It feels like shit - whereas I hope this piece of work feels like joy and wonder and delight.